BREAKING NEWS: Turkeys test positive for Coronavirus

Vdubpig

Member
Oct 27, 2019
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As a result, authorities are suggesting hunters stay home on opening weekend. I will be leading an expedition into gathering and testing turkey samples from a few undisclosed locations and will post the results (with photos) here in a few weeks. My son has agreed to help, and he and his other 12 yr old buddy will be (hopefully) collecting the first turkey specimens on junior opener weekend.

I know what some of you are thinking, so I'll address possible concerns here:

Q: What about your safety? Won't coming into contact with potentially infected birds unnecessarily expose you?
A: It's a risk I'm willing to take for the sake of you all.

Q: Wouldn't hunters collecting MANY samples that weekend enable a broader data analysis?
A: No. Hunting pressure on the birds may make it more difficult for me and my colleagues on the research team to get samples from large adult Toms with long beards - which is the target of the study. Also, the roadside chats normally consisting of, "hey, you see any birds moving this morning? Have any luck?" etc. creates close personal contact and may actually cause an infected hunter to spread it to me and my team.

Q: What about transporting the giant Toms you'll be collecting? Does that risk spreading the virus?
A: Not if they're wrapped in several layers of toilet paper. I will be posting our headquarter's address for TP donations to further ensure the sanctity of the study.
 
Be safe, Wearing complete camoflauge from head to toe will limit visibility from the virus and lower chance of infection
 
  • Haha
Reactions: Dawnandusk
As a result, authorities are suggesting hunters stay home on opening weekend. I will be leading an expedition into gathering and testing turkey samples from a few undisclosed locations and will post the results (with photos) here in a few weeks. My son has agreed to help, and he and his other 12 yr old buddy will be (hopefully) collecting the first turkey specimens on junior opener weekend.

I know what some of you are thinking, so I'll address possible concerns here:

Q: What about your safety? Won't coming into contact with potentially infected birds unnecessarily expose you?
A: It's a risk I'm willing to take for the sake of you all.

Vdubpig, maybe the Governor Goodhair will give you a medal. :p
 
The Gov Gavin "Any 2Sum" Newsom just order it! You can not go Turkey Hunting this Spring. All Turkey Hunters MUST stay at home. Turkeys are notorious virus spreading BIO weapons of mass destruction. The mutation of the Wuhan to Turkeys can cause - Loss of Sleep, Sitting and not moving for hours at a time, Getting Cold, Hyped Up Acute Awareness, Dressing like a Tree, Frustration, Depression, Cussing, Making Turkey Noises, Getting irritated, Bug Bites, Hunger Pains, The always next year blues.....etc...And on those rare occasions Euphoria! Be advised
 

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